One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon…
Demon: Why so glum chum?
Guy: What do you think? I’m in hell...god damn it!
Demon: Hell’s not so bad sunshine! We actually have a lot of fun down here…ehh..you a drinkin’ man?
Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.
Demon: Well you’re gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that’s all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, Jack, wine coolers…we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more! You do not have to worry about your liver whatsoever because you are already dead!
Guy: Gee that sounds great.( smiling)
Demon: You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.
Demon: Alright! You’re gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you’re already dead remember?
Guy: Wow…that’s…awesome!
Demon: I bet you like to gamble.
Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.
Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever… If you go Bankrupt…well you’re dead anyhow.
Demon: You into drugs?
Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don’t mean…
Demon: That’s right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that’s right - you’re dead - who cares! O.D.!!
Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin’ place!!
Demon: You gay?
Guy: Uhh no.
Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you’re really gonna hate Fridays.
--INternet--
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